What does that mean...that I have been busy lately? Is it that my days are full of important activities or that they are wasted away by the little things I choose to do?
I go to work, go home, eat, play with the kids, put them to bed, then maybe watch some TV, read a book, go to coffee with friends, or whatever, come home, and go to bed. It is a weekday routine that I guess I enjoy.
So even though I feel bad for not being a good friend - by saying that I have been busy gives me an excuse that says my busyness is more important than you or my busyness is the reason why I haven't called you in a while.
This conviction was brought upon me reading a little note from Ronnie Martin on his band's web site:
I kind of despise the phrase ".....just busy" when you ask someone what they're up to. We all use it, too. It's a blank statement that's used to keep people at a distance and to let them know that being busy indicates that you have some greater purpose in life. It's so rare to meet someone who simply says "I'm not busy, I have nothing to do whatsoever". It's refreshing. It immediately makes you connect with them because they're at a distance that can be reached, or that you'll be brave enough to actually try to reach.
We're not that busy. We choose our activities. We decide our own business. We do exactly what we want to do. On the flipside, I think I despise this generation because they're simply not busy enough.
11 comments:
I ask myself what I'm so busy doing all the time. I have to remind my self that I don't need to act all crazy busy when I talk to people. I have a friend who never seems busy and its nice.
I know I say it all the time and I feel like it when I say it--even when I haven't been busy. If I spent all day at work then did anything else for an hour or two after work, I think that's busy. :)
I think that there are people who like being busy and there are people who don't. I think for some people it is a way to brag and for others it is an excuse for not doing stuff. For me it is a nice excuse.
Yes, I like the excuse aspect. And for me, I think it is a matter of that I am 'busy enough' as compared to trully 'busy.'
I like to live a controlled relaxed life, so that I have time to be busy if I need to be. Busy with fun stuff that is.
I never thought of it as an excuse. I think of it more as a gift to the other person. They don't really want to know the details of my life so saying "I've been busy." is a nice way of saying I'll spare you the details.
Whoa nelly!!
Do you really think your friends are that shallow and don't really care? So, if you ever ask me what's up. I shouldn't tell you what is actually 'up,' I should just tell you I'm busy, because you really don't want to know.
I guess the example I was thinking about is the dear friend you love, but time has drifted you apart and your lucky if you see them once a year even though you live pretty close. And the only excuse for not staying in contact more is "i've been busy." ...and that very well may be true.
...but we are not really talking about giving away details, just an honest assesment of our so-called busyness.
I don't think others are being impolite when they answer with something other then "I'm busy." I was simply recognizing that I use that term and I have never meant it as an excuse.
I'm not good at small talk, obviously you've read some of my blogs. I give details, not assements. I just assume most people who ask are wanting assesments, my assement over the years has become "we're keeping busy." You want more then that with me you get details. I'm not saying that I'm right. In fact it often bothers me that I don't have better communication skills. I'm just making an observation that this is the way I am. :)
weird topic! I think we may use that as an excuse. I have been busy which means that I want to keep in contact, but please forgive me for my lax posting habits!
I use the "I've been busy" line to my grandparents when I realize that I haven't called or emailed them.
I hardly ever use the "busy line" with my friends.
I use the busy line every day. I'd write more about it, but I'm too busy to right now...
I use the "hey, you got a business card or something so I can keep in touch" and then I tuck it away dutifully into my wallet only to have it hide there for 6 months until I clean out my wallet and usually I am too embarrassed at that point to contact the person.
I am all about email nowadays! Even rather than the phone...which used to be glued to my ear.
This way I can stay in touch with my friends more easily...and keep my home priorities in order with raising kids, helping them with homework, cleaning house/dishes, AND keeping my health/rest up!
I used be interrupted all the time with the phone because I DID want to catch up with my friends...but it was hard to give proper balance/focus for me to other things.
By choosing the email method (and sometimes blogging), I am able to take of the boys...take care of me...and in my down time...send/read emails...even if it happens to be after "courtesy hours" of 9pm.
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